It was also used in Scotland for the engagement period of a year and a day before a wedding was proved.

The very word handfasting got it's origin in the wedding custom of tying the bride and groom's hands (actually, wrists) together. In some versions, this is only done for as long as the ceremony lasts, but in others, the cord is not untied until the marriage is physically consummated. Handfasting is the marriage rite used toady by many, neo-Pagans and Wiccans as well as those with a celtic background. The term itself comes from the custom of shaking hands over a contract. It is a custom steeped in old tradition.

In most Pagan traditions today it may mean a non-state registered wedding or one in which a marriage license is filed. For some it is a year and a day, renewable "so long as love shall last" and for others a commitment to be together through many lives.

There are probably as many rituals for this as there are people who have joined themselves together. The hands are generally bound with a cord as part of the ritual.

One custom is that while facing each other, the couple placed their right hands together and then their left hands together to form an infinity symbol while a cord is tied around their hands in a knot. Another custom is that the man and woman place their right hands only together while a cord is used to tie a knot around their wrists.

The ritual itself might have been led by a respected non-church affiliate such as a Chieftain, Leader, Priest, Priestess, Shaman, or Elder of the community while the couple took turns reciting their vows of promise to be engaged for a year and a day in front of witnesses. On the last day of "the year and a day promise" they would then make a promise for infinity repeating their promise to each again. A cord is tied in a knot around their hand while the ritual takes place. This is where the term "tie the knot came from" when referring to getting engaged or married today.

In day of old, records were not kept who got engaged, married, had kids, and died. Today the Sacraments of the church has the responsibility of taking care of these things. Before the church took over these duties, these things were overseen by the whole community and therefore were set in law by their witnessing what happened between the couple making the promise. If a handfasting was performed with the two left hands together without the tying of the knot, as was the custom of rich and influential German nobility, it meant that the woman was a mistress and would not be able to claim the name, inheritance, property, etc. of the real wife and was only in the protection of the man. But her offspring would be taken care of as legal heirs second in line to the man's legal and first wife. Having lots of children was once the only form of "Social Security" in one's old age. The previous combinations were all considered legal and binding in an engagement or marriage except for the "left hand ritual."

The Handfasting gesture seems to have been derived from one of the ancient Indo-European images of male-female conjunction, the infinity sign, whose twin circles represented the sun (female) and the moon (male) or in some of the southern Mediterranean traditions it was sun (male) and moon (female).

Two-handed Handfasting still constituted a fully legal marriage throughout Europe whether the blessing of the church was sought or not. Clergymen, of course, recommended that newlyweds attend church as soon as possible after the signing of the contract and the Handfasting. Marriage is now one the Seven Sacraments that had been ignored by the church for centuries. Only the very wealthy and affluent could afford church marriages. Handfastings were under the jurisdiction of common law rather than canon law. In the 16th century in Switzerland, if couples were seen in public drinking together they could be considered married.

There are suspicions that this custom came from Wales. There is what was called the 'besom wedding', an unofficial custom that was considered quite lawful in parts of Wales until recent times. A birch besom was placed aslant in the open doorway of the house, with its head on the doorstep and the top of its handle on the door-post. First a young man jumped over it, then his bride, in the presence of witnesses. If either touched or knocked it in any way, the marriage was not recognized. In this kind of marriage, a woman kept her own home and did not become the property of her husband. It was a partnership, "cyd-fydio," rather than an ownership. A child of the marriage was considered to be legitimate. If the couple decided to divorce, they simply jumped back over the broomstick again, but this could only be done in the first year of marriage. If a child had come, it was the father's responsibility.

Here is an example of a simple handfasting:

"­­­_________ and ________, as your hands are bound together now,
so your lives and spirits are joined in a union of love and trust.
Above you are the stars and below you is the earth.
Like the stars your love should be a constant source of light,
and like the earth, a firm foundation from which to grow."

A SAMPLE HANDFASTING CEREMONY

______ and _______ have chosen to incorporate the ancient Celtic ritual of Handfasting into their wedding ceremony today. Traditionally, in the British Isles it was performed by a priest or priestess, who would invoke the energies of the four natural elements to create a sacred circle in which the couple could be joined as embodiments of god and goddess. The cloth that binds their hands was usually the tartan plaid, representing the groom's clan or family group. One of the things we like about handfasting is that it is also a declaration of intent, where the bride and groom clearly state that they are marrying of their own free will.

______and _______, know now before you go further,
that since your lives have crossed in this life, you have formed eternal and sacred bonds. As you seek to enter this state of matrimony you should strive to make real the ideals that to you, give meaning this ceremony and to the institution of marriage.

With full awareness, know that within this circle you are not only declaring your intent to be handfasted before your friends and family, but you speak that intent also to your creative higher powers. The promises made today and the ties that are bound here greatly strengthen your union and will cross the years and your. Do you still seek to enter this ceremony?

Yes.

INVOKING THE FOUR DIRECTIONS

(optional generally used by those with a Pagan leaning)

In many cultures it is believed that the human soul shares characteristics with all things divine. It is this belief which assigned virtues to the four cardinal directions;
East, South, West and North. It is according to this belief that we align ourselves with these elements. Each of these blessings from the four cardinal directions emphasizes
those things which will help you build a happy and successful union.[Guests are invited to stand and face the four directions]

Blessed be this union with the gifts of the East and the element of Air, for openness and breath, communication of the heart, and purity of the mind and body. From the east you receive the gift of a new beginning with the rising of each Sun, and the understanding that each day is a new opportunity for growth.

Blessed be this union with the gifts of the South and the element of fire, for energy, passion, creativity and the warmth of a loving home. From the fire within you generate light, which you will share with one another in even the darkest of times.

Blessed be this union with the gifts of the West, the element of water, for your capacity to feel emotion. In marriage you offer absolute trust to one another, and vow to keep your hearts open in sorrow as well as joy.

Blessed be this union with the gifts of the North, the element of earth, which provides sustenance, fertility and security. The earth will feed and enrich you, and help you to build a stable home to which you may always return. [guests are seated] END Four Directions

______ and _______, I bid you look into each others eyes. Will you honor and respect one another, and seek to never break that honor?

We will [the first cord is draped over the couples' hands] And so the first binding is made.

Will you share each other's pain and seek to ease it?

We will [Second cord is draped over the hands] And so the binding is made

Will you share the burdens of each so that your spirits may grow in this union?
We will [third cord is draped over the couples' hands]
And so the binding is made.

Will you share each other's laughter, and look for the brightness in life and the positive in each other?
We will. [forth cord is draped over the couples' hands]
And so the binding is made.

[Tie cords together]

________ and _______, as your hands are bound together now,
so your lives and spirits are joined in a union of love and trust.
Above you are the stars and below you is the earth.
Like the stars you love should be a constant source of light,
and like the earth, a firm foundation from which to grow.

-------------------------

(from this point the ceremony can move on to traditional vows
and/or the traditional ring exchange)